Monday, 17 March 2008

I've been proposed to!

Yes. I have been asked to be a blushing bride.
Thank you, thank you ever so much...but wait 'cos it gets better...

...the question was popped by a gross dude in Sainsbury's *shudders*

I don't half get some creepy men after me sometimes. It really is quite gross.
This dude was following me around the shop earlier this afternoon when I went in to grab a few bits and bobs. Well, I say following, he was pretty much walking behind me the whole time and asking if he can grab anything for me. Rather embarassing when you're down the tampon isle and all you can hear is "I am not scared. I get them for you. Regular? Super? I don't mind!" (yes, that really happened...).
I left vowing not to return for a few weeks just to try and shake off the sick feeling of having to ever bump into him again. Fat lot of good the vowing did, 'cos I had to go back with mum to get easter eggs for my little cousins. I tried the "I don't partake of Easter" excuse, but she told me to stop being a grouch and dragged me along anyway.
Shopping was fine and we didn't bump into anyone unsavory...until we got to the till and he was there. He chatted to my mum about sharing the eggs we had just bought, then his eyes fall to me and he goes "Ah, so this must be your beautiful daughter. Hello again"
I mumbled hello then walked off to start packing bags, but he stoped me saying "may I see your hand please?"
I looked over to mum but she just shrugged, so I held out my hands and the dude leaned in and said "Ah, you wear a lot of rings, but the important finger is bare".
Mum burst out laughing and I quickly pulled my hands back and carried on stuffing bags with eggs. I did manage to mumble "and it's staying that way" but I doubt it could be heard over mum's cackles.
He then started going "You can make beautiful babies, I see it in your eyes. We could make them...I could take that finger for you."
Mum cracked up again and I just said "Mate, I'm already taken...and!"
"You are not taken. I see no ring. I would get you one if you will be mine."
"I aint being wife number 15 or whatever so bike it!"
then mum cut in with "yeah, her boyfriend wouldn't be too pleased" then "but she annoys me enough, you can take her."
"Aha, a mother's permission is binding where I am from."
"Oh just fuck off."
"Shelly, don't swear."
"Just pay and go before he pulls a dress from under the counter or something..."

I feel gross now.
Why do women enjoy attention like that? Seriously? I can't fucking stand it.
He seemed like a complete wasteman *shudders*

Urghhhhh, someone run me a bath...and get me a scouring pad.

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